PURPLE ZOMBIE GIRL'S BLOG

It bloomed! The flower was so beautiful and to be honest the smell was quite mild though it definitely worked to attract pollinators. Those pollinators were roaches btw and there were like ten of them. It was tall and gorgeous and worth the wait to see it bloom. I helped a woman take a picture with it which made me happy. Photo will be below.

I go into the greenhouse and there was a baby corpse plant that was bloomed? It reeked it was crazy, and very beautiful. I will add a photo below. I'm even more excited to to see the big one it is going to be insane and I think it might make me nauseous because the little one did.

I was in class and like my professor said that nobody asked a question at the guest lecture we had to attend. I said that's not true I did I have the question in my notes app I can show you. Then this girl in a kinda mean voice was like I took notes I can tell you what you asked. It makes me feel like I'm super loud and that I don't know how much space I take up in an obnoxious way. I think it's ok to be loud and passionate, and that I never say anything that's rude. Also people laugh so much when I talk when I I don't say anything funny. But I realized that my favorite professor has the same thing happen to him so I am trying not to sweat it. I like me and I think the people who say things that hurt my feelings like me too I am just eccentric to them. It is a insecurity that I have held since childhood and I don't want to let it ruin how I interact with people. Tldr: I almost let the haters win but I'm getting my money up

I wear makeup in a goth way like wearing really white foundation, and my favorite lipstick color is black. I know goth is a music group first and I always listened to goth music peripherally but recently I have been really immersing myself in the genre. It's so vast and fun. I wish there were more intersections between hip hop and goth music. My brother and I think the closest to the sound is like cloud rap and lyrically more like trippie redds music. Most importantly though the Memphis Horrorcore scene, but it lacks the ambient noises that cloud rap has. I think trippie redd is a little cringe but I understand his appeal to teenage boys figuring themselves out. I know it is out there and I'm going to find it. I'm trying to curate my idea of it with songs I already know. I will update y'all in my journey.

The corpse flower in the greenhouse is getting super big its going to bloom soon so I'm checking it everyday until it does. I want to smell it so bad I am so so curious like the anticipation is killing me. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. I am so so so excited I'll post a picture of the bloomed flower when I see it stay tuned.

My mom made brunch and I got cool gifts. Im 20 so crazy omg! :D A lot of my friends forgot my birthday but I am trying to give them grace. I got really emotional but I am calm. My family treats me so good on my birthday and it makes me feel so special. I really do love my life. Tomorrow I am getting tested for adhd lol lets just say I am probably gonna ace this thing :P Life gets so much more complicated every year don't yall think?

I love being around my huge rambunctious family but sometimes the rough housing is too rough. It is energy consuming and it takes energy away from talking to my boyfriend. I always feel like I am getting pulled in so many different directions and I can't be there for everyone. My 20th birthday is in a couple days and I hope it goes well around my 15 other relatives. I am feeling stressed like before my episode but I have to remember how much my family loves me and will support me. These next couple days will be about staying balanced and not putting expectations on anything. Gonna go with tha flow :P

I used my new special makeup today, got my nails done, and had lobster pasta. I'm so full of love and food haha. I got the benetint in dark cherry and I am thinking of wearing it on my knuckles to make me more undead looking. My boyfriend thought I looked really cute today and he was super sweet. I am one lucky lady.

My grandmother and I are spending the week together and I am learning so much about my family history. I had no idea about so so much and it is really nice to get closer with her. I am one of four kids and I can't even count how many cousins so I never really get to sit with her alone

love zombies and I think they are so cute, just like me! I'm a girl who always feel super hazy and sometimes my back problem makes my walk look funny. I groan and get obsessed very easily. Most zombies want brains or to infect, I want to eat icecream and bite my boyfriend hehe. Green and purple and pink look sooo good on me. My favorite is using purple eyeshadow to make my eyebags look stylish instead of trying to hide them. I embrace that my girliness and my rotteness make me so special :)

SPOILERS 28 YEARS LATER BONE TEMPLE He is just so me idk. Obviously I am not a big murderous infected man who rips people's spines out like you would open up a crawfish but I see myself in him... vaguely. I have episodes of hypomania and I know what it is like to be scared in my mind. To be honest, watching him get cured by Kelson helped me to get the confidence to see a psych and get on medication. It is healing seeing that disorders, genetic or by infection are not a pre-determinalistic prophecy that one will be destructive. I am in control with a little help from doctors and friends :)